Always fancied myself as a rouleur. I can do most things on a bike quite well. Its hard enough to drop me up a hill, I can win the odd sprint and whilst I dislike time-trials I know I'm not the worst at them. That all may change soon. A slice of roulade yesterday made me think. Well, ok, more than a slice of roulade. It was a conversation about diet and diets that did it. Turns out I should be changing a few things. Getting the weight manageable, leaving out certain toxic foods, you know the drill. This conversation took place over a superb roulade. And as I cycled home I pondered if a gluten-free anything was as good as the full-sugar, full diabetes-inducing bad stuff I'm used to. I persuaded myself that I felt light-headed because there was no sugar rush. And ate a banana. Which apparently isn't totally right either. So its looking more roulade than rouleur next season.
I've been looking at organic meats lately and realising I'm not rich enough. Honestly, the price of an organic chicken in some places has me picturing a hen doing a pimp-strut down the supermarket aisle weighed down with gold chains. Like a Mr T with feathers. And without the Snickers diet. Ham is the same. A chunk of organic ham is equal to the price of a whole pig in some places. And then, as was pointed out to me, I'd be boiling it in fluoride-rich water which would probably undo all the good. And farmed salmon seems to be so toxic that a weekend sunbathing in Chernobyl would be preferable. But if I stay eating as I am I won't be IN the grupetto next year, I'll BE the grupetto.
Still, I worry. Cellulite appears like a road map on my body. Albeit a road to nowhere. My arteries are hardening as the rest of me goes soft. What should I do? Today's foods cause me stress...Life's stresses make me want to eat. A dietary Catch-22.
Age isn't all bad. I know I'll have to work hard to shed weight and I'll just have to get to it. Also, weight might have a lot to do with it but there's plenty of skinny-latte cyclists not finishing races I'm doing and likewise I've been roundly beaten [pardon the pun] by guys much heavier than me, even on rolly courses. Diet isn't everything it seems. Beetroot juice made me flatulent as hell. So in theory it works if you count jet-propulsion. Gels are just a nicely wrapped version of a banana. Artificial monkey food. I thought keytones were the noises my house alarm buttons make. And over the roulade it was suggested to quit potatoes, breads and crisps. Lee Child had a novel a while back entitled "Worth Dying For". I thought it was about those three foods.
Sitting here writing I feel as if I'm in the middle of a perfect storm. Tiredness and stress are part and parcel of my life. Cycling helps. But so does wine [Merlot has loads of antioxidants!!!]. Food gives me energy and I don't have the time to belt out a salad of Nigella Lawson's standard. [Although I suspect she may be covering her lettuce in chocolate sauce....].Half a bakery a day fills the void and gives me the energy to play with the kids, bamboozle the students and fulfil family commitments on top of a sneaky spin. I know I'm slowly killing myself off and doing myself no favours but its all I've got to give right now. I might try fasted rides although I'm confused as I thought a fasted ride was getting the shift outside the Colosseum disco before you got to the chipper....
the excesses of Summer holidays
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